The Blessing and the Curse of Being Awake: Notes from the Quarterly Attunement

Reflections from the St. Germaine Channeling Session with William FitzRoy & Ryan Fukuda

In our recent Quarterly Attunement, the energy in the room was palpable. We are living through a moment of intense societal turbulence—a time when the ground beneath us feels like it is shifting daily.

When I opened the channel to St. Germaine, the guidance that came through wasn't about "fixing" the world or "fighting" the chaos. It was about something much harder.

It was about The Great Letting Go.

The themes that emerged from the group were universal: the fear of being seen, the heaviness of waiting for others, and the terror of spiritual vastness. But the answer to each was the same: You cannot become who you are going to be if you are still gripping who you used to be.

One of the first questions came from a practitioner asking how to find healing amidst uncontrollable societal change. We feel the demand to do something, to resist, to fight.

But St. Germaine offered a different directive: Look for the space between.

Healing is not found in the frantic reaction to the world; it is found in the stillness between the impulse to act and the impulse to resist. The hardest thing to do in a storm is to "do nothing"—to observe, to wait, and to conserve your energy for the precise moment of participation.

If you lose your space to the demand of the world, you have nothing left to give when the moment actually arrives.

Ryan Fukuda asked about the mechanics of letting go of the past. St. Germaine identified this as "the question of our time."

We resist letting go not because we love our memories or even our traumas. We resist because our entire identity is built on them.

If you let go of the past, you lose the scaffolding of your ego. You become a blank slate. And while that offers the ultimate freedom—the freedom to be entirely new—it is terrifying to the part of us that craves definition.

Transformation requires a real sacrifice: You have to be willing to be a nobody so you can become somebody new.

Another powerful moment arose when a student asked about a persistent "heaviness" she was feeling.

St. Germaine identified this heaviness immediately: It is the burden of waiting for everyone else to catch up.

Many sensitives carry a deep, maternal consensus energy. We slow down our own growth, dim our own lights, and carry the weight of everyone else's uncertainty because we are afraid to be alone. We don't want to leave anyone behind.

But this waiting creates resentment. It creates a drag on your spirit.

The relief comes when you realize: You are not responsible for their journey. You are only responsible for your own "Force of Being."

We closed the session with a stark truth: "It is both a blessing and a curse to be awake."

If you are willing to have the blessing (the clarity, the vision, the connection), you must be willing to have the curse (the sensitivity, the awareness of pain, the responsibility).

St. Germaine offered the metaphor of the Tornado Chaser.

Most people run from the storm (fear). The mystic runs toward the storm, not because they are reckless, but because they are seeking the eye. They are seeking the fear that is met with the joy of being a force of nature themselves.

True transformation requires stepping off the cliff. It requires letting go of the handrails of the past, the safety of the group, and the definition of the ego.

It is a sacrifice. But it is the only way to be transfigured.

🔭 One of the truly magical things about our community at Art of the Seer is that since we share a commitment to the same tools, techniques, and practice container, it’s easy to reach out to each other members and create your own reading and healing exchanges. Using this post as inspiration, find a partner to work with—perhaps someone you know from a current or previous class, or post in the practicum chat groups that you were inspired by this post and find someone new to explore with.

Pair up with a reading partner and exchange 30-minute Clairvoyant Readings together. Practice both giving and receiving as a way of deepening your experience and relationship to this topic.

The Reading Topics:

Healing Focus: Give the readee a healing on their Time Track. Help them dissolve the cords to the past that are only there to prop up an old identity. Help them bring their energy fully into Present Time.

Sometimes something is too charged to feel safe being vulnerable in interpersonal spaces with it at first. If this is really stimulating you, you can work this energy in meditation using your tools, or in moments of embodiment and pause throughout your day.

The Identity Drop

St. Germaine suggests that we resist letting go because we fear being "no one." Practice being no one for 60 seconds.

Tell me in the comments: If you fully let go of who you "used to be," what is the scariest part of that freedom?

Sometimes we need to write it down to get it out of our aura. People learn, experience, and process energy in a variety of ways—visually, auditorily, conceptually—and here at AotSA, we validate all those different forms. If you process through writing, take 10 minutes with your journal to "audit" a recurring picture in your space you’ve come across using this template.